DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Whore-y Cows

Wassup Chi-town?

You know we love you, right? You're home to so many delightful things and people: Wilco, Charlie Trotter's, R. Kelly's Trapped in the Closet, deep-dish pizza, our very own intern Jasmine, and, of course, the Cubbies. Is there anything cooler in baseball than that ivy-covered outfield (Jen would say The Green Monster, but she's wicked biased)? So it really took the Windy City out of our sails to read about these fuku-ed up t-shirts that are selling like hot bräts outside Wrigley. Y'know, the ones that read "Horry Kow!" (translasian: "Holy Cow!"--an homage to the late, great game announcer Harry Caray)? With the chinky-ass bear on the front and Cub outfielder Kosuke Fukudome's name and number on the back?

Hang on a sec...did we just write that Fukudome's name and number are on the back of this tee? Horry Shit--is this what you call a tribute to your new star from Japan? Wonder what he thinks of this ching-chong nonsense. Oh wait...

"I don't know what the creator of the shirt meant this to be, but they should make it right," Fukudome said through his interpreter after being shown one of the shirts Thursday. "Maybe the creator created it because he thought it was funny, or maybe he made it to condescend the race. I don't know."

Do ya really wanna piss off a guy who's batting .321, has an OBP of .441, and isn't a diva about getting shifted around in the outfield?

Here's the thing. There's still time to make it right. This t-shirt is an unlicensed piece of shit merch selling on Addison Street across from the park. The merch stand's operator is a charming, enlightened dude named Mark who doesn't see what all the fuss is about:

"I'm making money,'" he said. "It doesn't offend me. If other people are offended by it, it's just a silly T-shirt. Nobody is trying to offend anybody."

Mark says that only 1 in 10 people who come up to the stand tell him that the shirt is offensive. Let's make that 10 in 10, shall we?

Chi-town, we're counting on you. Don't disappoint us.

UPDATE: Aww. You make us so proud, Chicago!

Source
Thanks, Jasmine!